Blessings – Written February 26, 2006

I was born a Blessed Child – the first born, the first grandchild on my paternal side and the first girl grandchild on my maternal side. My childhood is filled with happy memories – filled with the love and attention of my parents, my yaya, my grandparents, aunts and uncles….
Fast forward 33 years…. I am a Blessed Child.

I have not always counted the Blessings in my life, choosing instead to look at what I do not have, what I still need to achieve and where I still needed to go. I took the love, support and encouragement that I have always received forgranted.  Figure entitlement. Figure part of the package. Figure it was just always there and will always be there.

For the most part of my life, I was able to do the things that I wanted to do. I travelled, lived overseas, ran a Restaurant, played with family and friends, played Golf, picked up Diving, relocated to a new country, got a fabulous Career, bought my own place and have become self sufficient. To most people, I could not ask for more.

However, being the human being that I am, I wanted more…. I wanted everything….. specifically the thing that was missing in my life… a solid relationship…onwards to marriage. Being the focused, strongminded and hardworking person that I am… all of my energy was focused on making my relationship work. I was determined….not realising that I have stopped counting my blessings, but instead equated blessings with how the relationship fared.

The relationship ended several months ago.

I would never wish a heartbreak upon anyone. However, cliche as it is, when God closes a door on you, He does leave a window opened.

Since letting go of the relationship, I have started to find myself again and maybe see my blessings again. I have travelled once again. I started to play with family and friends again, and really enjoy it wholeheartedly. I have gained a beautiful niece who supposedly is born a carbon copy of me. I have started to see and feel the love of my family and friends once again…. and it is only February. I can only imagine what else might be ahead.

Today, I no longer want to see it as entitlement. I choose to see it as a gift….and I know that I have received so much. I also know that I will continue to be blessed, not as how I choose but as how God chooses.

I may or may not be blessed with what I still do not have in my life…. It no longer matters. Anything beyond what I already have is just icing on my already decadent cake.

I truly am a Blessed Child.